Saturday, April 24, 2010

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


a good plot for a bestseller...
"Is it okay what i am about to do here? Maybe. Perhaps. Who knows? My therapist will have to know this. I am so gonna tell her. Definitely. I won't say real names, I won't say where or why, mainly because I don't know the reasons. I will simply announce here that I was a victim of a psychopath last year. I will call this person Regan. This person looks like the little girl from The Exorcist movie, hence the name. It was obscure the experience of having this type of person around. I am so sensitive to these sort of things that next month it will be my one-year therapy anniversary. Therapy has been putting me back on track. I won't tell the whole story now 'cause I am afraid I might faint in front of my laptop. I am not in the mood for details today. But I'll certainly continue this story. It won't be pretty. I am warning you. And by blurting out about this horrible experience may help me exorcise this nuisance figure off of my head."

Thursday, April 8, 2010

some "meh" moment...


by Laila Chris

in a matter of weeks i am gonna finish this painting

My throat hurts. I played too much Rock Band II yesterday.
My fave songs to sing are EVERLONG and FLOAT ON... NICE!
And I am really getting better to that drumming thing.
I can play the guitar or bass on HARD now. NOOOOOT! I wish though.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

It is 6 in the morning and I am already thinking of lunch

I am so gonna have lunch at McD's today. Tired of controlling diet.
Check out the other types of McD's menus from all around the world.
Man, how lovely this carpet is. This photo was taken at the hotel we stayed in London. This inn was not that great, but hey, it was still London!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

What a relief!

The weather has changed a little and it does feel more enticing these last few days.

I wish I had a photo camera to register the afternoons we are having or at least my video camera images could be uploaded or downloaded (never know the right way to say/write) in a faster and easier way. That way I would be able to post something nice here. There is this software that needs installing and Roberto is definitely not helping me in that matter.

Well, he is trying to make me committed to my nutrionist suggested diet. I really want to get fit and eat healthier, but it is a huge hassle. It is kinda hardwork and too much thinking when all I want is simply inhale food whenever I want to, don't get me started with wine. Oh wine. I am just like OLD CHRISTINE (what a nice show).

I wish life were easier for me. I wish things were at least less complicated in the back of my mind. I am so troubled that I can barely restrain myself. I cry often. I yell often. I bullshit often. Sometimes I feel like I am so alone and so desperate. I am writing just the way I used to back in 2005. If you check the files from that period, it does sound like a dejavu or flashbacks or whatever you would wish to call. I am going to Toronto in July. Been taking up oil painting lessons. I even want to take FLAMENCO but I haven't got any call back from the school. They are so crowed that they don't seem to find time to contact me.

 I am seeing PLACEBO performing live this coming Tuesday. Have got two cats, now (the loves of my life). I am living in a home finally (after long 6 years incarcerated in a classroom that I needed to call home). I even have cable. Hey, who doesn't deserve cable? Although, because of this I have watched many fewer movies. I don't get to go to theaters because of that. I didn't get to see Avatar, and honestly I wouldn't anyway 'cause I am not an animation person. There are only a few animation flicks that I got the patient to see: Toy Story 1, Corpse Bride, Monsters Inc, and the classic cartoons that I used to catch on TV. I am so having fun by re-watching Thundercats. LOL.

Oh, I forgot to mention, I started going to the gym and being trained by a personal trainer. PERSONAL TRAINER. Yeah! That's right. A few years ago I would say: HOW BOURGEOIS! Now I say: HOW NECESSARY! We get old and our body changes but our traumas and inner conflicts never change. How ironic!

Friday, April 2, 2010

Re-posting on SURREALISM

Surrealism, strategically at this point in my life, has fascinated me. In order to understand this style of art making, I decided to visit the Salvador Dali Museum back in 2001.

That museum is located in Saint Petersburg - USA, the city where I used to live in the USA. The Salvador Dali Museum is a fantastic place that everyone must visit. It has the world largest permanent collection of Dali’s paintings. It helps us understand how the surrealists depicted things from the artist personal life, historical facts or everyday situations and their connection with psychoanalysis studies.

Surrealism is an important movement in modern art and literature, which started between the wars, mainly in France. The idea was to free the artist from the demands of logic and to penetrate beyond everyday consciousness to the “super-reality” that lies behind. Dali was not alone in this movement. Magritte and Tanguy are also famous painters who used the distorted way to register the reality.

Surrealist artists wanted their work to be a link between the abstract spiritual realities and the real forms of the material world. To them, the object stood as a metaphor for an inner reality. Through their craft, whether it be painting, sculpting or drawing, artists could bring the inner realities of the subconscious to the conscious mind, so that their meaning could be deciphered through analysis.

Salvador Dali was born at Figueras in Spain. He studied in Madrid and moved to Paris later, where he joined the surrealists and became one of the principal figures of the movement. In 1940 he settled in the USA with his wife Gala, and devoted his art to symbolic religious paintings. Dali became also a wealthy man through commercial works in design and advertisement fields.

My visit at the Salvador Dali Museum made me realize how connected Freud’s theories and his paintings are. However, Dali experienced different genres and perspectives in his works, from impressionist to classical surrealist . The galleries of the museum are divided by these genres (or art periods): “portraite”, “landscape painting”, “the figure”, “still life”, “the grotesque”, and his huge “masterworks” – also known as the classic period.

The division in his works in these six categories allows us to visualize the full development and diversity of Dali’s creativity from 1914(age 10) to 1980.

His classic phase impressed me the most. It is located in time from 1948 to 1970. During this period, he executed eighteen large oil canvases that are now called the “masterworks”. Some of the titles are “The Discovery of America by Christopher Columbus”, “The Ecumenical Council”, and “The Hallucinogenic Toreador”. Dali became more interested in religion, history and modern science during that time. Diego Velazquez and Raphael had influenced him mainly.

As an artist, Dali was complete. He painted, sculpted, designed jewelry, clothes, accessories, furniture, and turned himself into an icon. He made his living with his inspiring artwork. He became famous when still alive. Salvador symbolizes the surrealist movement. His contribution to the modern visual arts is infinite.

Visiting the Salvador Dali Museum I could verify his excellence as a creative (almost crazy) painter that will influence art genres of artists still to come.

My personal impression about surrealism:>

Don't know yet whether I am influenced by this style. What I know so far is that artists such as Magritte and Dali have encountered power and madness through their strokes on their canvases that can modify people's deep concepts of life and the world. The thing is that I deal with language and I haven't learned how to give to it a surreal feature.

I haven't been able to declare to everyone that that style is the only possible way of art making so that he/she may make a fully Surrealist use of it. To the extent that I am expected to make me understood, I try to offer in my writings an ability to the reader for speaking my poetry, as he/she would be reading a letter, or providing him/her written images to carry on a conversation (for the pleasure of conversing) with someone (with me)... Something like it.


My office is a "Horder's Shrine"

...and I am so proud of it! Ha.🎉🎉🎉