Panic Button

"My place is like PANIC ROOM and I do mean that. We have had alarms, cameras, and surveillance services installed and hired. All my moves can be watched on those little screens. If there is anyone trying to break into my school, I can hit a PANIC BUTTON - really called "panic" button - and police patrols must show up as quick as possible (at least, I should believe in that.) On one hand, I feel more comfortable having these devices working at our place, but on the other, I'd appreciate if they were not needed. Wherever I walk in the house, I am spotted with red lights flashing in each corner. My life seems like a reality show this way. It's crazy weird."

I wrote that paragraph above on my BUZZNET journal about a week or two ago. Since then, I've slept better since those devices give me a "maybe" impression of safety but violence is still out there. I have seen violence of all sorts on TV news: violence in soccer matches; violence in prisons; violence on Brazilian roads. About 42,000 people die a year in car wrecks. Another 40,000 die a year due to fire guns. 200 cellphones are stolen a day in São Paulo city. 13 cars were stolen just yesterday in this town where I live in. Even though, I have got to live under a so-called normality because otherwise I wouldn't have a life.

However I can't disguise the fact that I do not have an ordinary kind of life. I am never at ease. Early this morning, a student of mine had his car stolen by two demented crooks loaded with guns. The robbery happened at 10 in the morning on a busy street downtown. Luckily, he was not carjacked and he was insured. He is not the only person I know who had gone through that. Many relatives, friends, and acquaintances of mine have. And I have too.

I don't want to make this post a cry for help or turn Brazil's image into a warfare place. Yet, not many people can imagine small towns filled with fenced houses having 3 to 4 locks on front doors. Not many people know what means to have to check out if each window and door is locked before going to bed. Not many people know what it is to have rehearsed moves, like fire drills, every time you leave and arrive home so that it is clear that no strangers who may be around the place get you standing at the doorstep while locking or unlocking and they take you forcibly into your house with pointed weapons or guns. Then, those crooks steal everything from you. That is the most common way to have a house robbed or a car stolen down here. And it does happen often. Brazilian cops clearly don't do their jobs. So, we pay fortunes to have alarms and private surveillance services. Purchasing alternative ways to believe that we are safe is an out-of-question topic for Brazilian citizens.

When I walk downtown I watch my steps. I am always checking my back and I never talk to strangers - it is always a risk to take. We barely stop at red lights after midnight and don't get me started on answering machines that say:"We are not in town for the week, so leave a message after the tone..." You oughtta be stupid. When you come back home from a wonderful vacation trip, not even your walls will be upright sustaining the ceiling. It is so damn common to have houses broken into and all people's belongings are vanished - easily taken - and no one calls the police. No neighbors notice a thing. No noises are heard while the robbery is taking place.

It's a strange thing to live under these circumstances. It's not like experiencing COPS - the TV show. It's not actually like living in a reality show. It's way worse than that but I guess it might be really close to what Jodie Foster went through on that movie PANIC ROOM. I fear being on the streets. It frightens me if the doors aren't locked during the day. It used to scare me to sleep without alarms around the house. Now, I'm trying to convince Roberto to get a car insurance which covers stolen property... He's being a hard ass on that.

CURIOSITY FACT: While teaching a private class this morning, my student received a cellphone call with this message:"Your grandpa has killed himself with a shot gun..." Blame it on depression, I guess.