Anooooooooooooother MEME...

I know vacation has been over for a while but I am still in that mood. I feel lazy to write those long and kind-of-essay posts. So, I decided to write one more of those 'meme' quizes. The questions published here, I've found somewhere on the web in someone's blog (yeah! what a precise citation)... Gee, I hope the person does not sue me for this. I didn't mean to copy the idea... I literally stole it.

What I liked most about this meme is that the questions will sound a bit "macabre". They are all related to death. I never understood why our western culture has issues with this topic. It is never discussed over family suppers. It is never mentioned when people play pocker. It is the kind of subject that people don't normally use to strike up conversations in elevators: "Nice day, isn't it?" "Yeah, it is just perfect for drowning in any Caribbean beach." A taboo is what it is. Although, I grew up in a family that we would widely talk about death without prude or hypocrisy. We even sort of celebrated when we got to pay off for all of our family future funeral expenses which inevitably one of us would have to cash out when "lady death" arrives. Weird? I think this is called "planning ahead".

I sometimes wonder what and how people would feel about reading a blog of someone who has already passed away. I don't mean a posthumous blog. No. That is not my point. I actually thought of my friends, former students, or relatives of mine reading my words and seeing my faces in random posts here, at this spot, after my death. Would they laugh at my nonsense entries even though I'd be gone and not being able to post anything new? Would they laugh just once? Or maybe they would crack over and over by reading the same old things just because it is stamped in each of my writings that LIFE IS NOTHING BUT A JOKE.

Do I fear death? I am quite sure that I don't. However, I am a little reluctant with this 'stuff' just because of the fact that death normally comes with pain and suffering of the others who survive. Our western civilization does not allow us to see this process (so-called DEATH) as being something positive which, to my humble opinion, it is. Why? How come that could be positive? Simple answer: it is not fully pleasurable being alive. It is not wholesome having to work 14 hours a day to pay for facilities, afford transportation, canned food, health insurance, hair stylist, bottox, birth control pills, and Neutrogena exfoliating masks. No no no. It is no damn big deal being alive if we insist in not caring about self-awareness. It is just a simple thing, and yet we can't accept its plainness.

The Death Quiz

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Travel, travel, travel a lot;
2. Publish a book;
3. Spit on my ex-boss' misso soup :)
4. Have two kids;
5. Try to repay my parents for everything they've given me (including the already-paid funeral services);
6. See my favorite bands live;
7. Teach my kids to stand up for what they believe;

Seven things you would like to have at your funeral:
1. A bus - to help everybody commute from the church to the cemitery (Hope passangers remember to sing and clap "Oh Happy Day!" on their way). This way, everyone would behave ecologically correct by using only one transportation instead of creating those large lines of cars polluting the city and blocking the flow of the traffic (some people have the talent to bug even after being dead);
2. Good food, good drinks, and good music (pleeeeease);
3. Hope my relatives can afford to hire stand-up comedians to entertain the services;
4. If not, they can just let some of their DVDs run in private rooms;
5. No cries, no regrets, no enemies must pop up there either;
6. Lap-dancers or go-go girls can be hired too (no prejudices);
7. I am gonna steal that from Saucy - 'a pipe of laughing gas would work fine next to the keg of brew' LOL;

Seven celebrities that deserve to die:
1. Paris Hilton;
2. Cher (yew - all of her fans can kiss my ass);
3. Carrot Top (is he still alive?);
4. Britney Spears;
5. Ben Afleck;
6. All those who have ever participated at the Oscars;
7. And those who deny being part of this mega event;

Seven words you'll probably say seconds prior the moment your soul departures:
1. Hihihihi
2. One beer before I go;
3. hey, you go first;
4. nooooooooow???
5. Does anyone have some stash???
6. Fuck everybody;
7. I love everybody;

Seven reasons not to die:
1. Smile of a child;
2. Some people just don't look good in black;
3. Not being able to see lady bugs, spiders, and dragonflies after it;
4. Visine profits too much over that;
5. Good and tasteful sense of humor people should not leave;
6. Death's never scheduled - how rude!
7. Having to empty wardrobes and box of letters of the gone souls - just not fair;

Everyone will die sooner or later. So given a choice to decide your deathplace, where will you choose?
Any place on this planet is worth living and dying. I'd only rather not have a distressful trip to only-God-knows-where.

Since this is a very delicate topic, I don't feel like taggin' anyone for this "meme" because that would make me a murderer-wannabe, wouldn't it?