THE THESIS

by Thomas Van Stockum

She pointed out that my paper lacked
a proper aim or goal.
I needed to include a statement of thesis,
to pave a way for the discourse of my argument.
I tell her I do not like to give away my surprises.
She responds by showing me well-written conclusions
from professional essays.
"See! This is where your surprise should be."
I tell her I don't like surprises.
She shrugs and I know she has not been listening.
Not that I ever listen to her.
I leave w/ my tail between my legs,
my grade unchanged.

On the bus home I read over my paper
and try to understand what she told me,
even though there is nothing more to understand.
If you have a boring thesis, no one will read your essay.
If you don't have a thesis, then you don't have an essay.
Save the surprises for the end, that's what I said.
That is also apparently what she said.
What a bitch.