Great video on bipolar disorder...

Positive thinking

"Oh RLY?"

This is an excellent time for making plans for the future and creating organizational systems, as well as for all other intellectual and mental efforts. However, there is a tendency to avoid really difficult mental or intellectual problems, taking the easy way out instead. But if you can create the proper sense of discipline, you should be able to overcome these negative effects and make this a day of very creative mental activity. This influence opens up and sharpens your mind so that you see, even if subliminally, all the possibilities inherent in a situation. This enables you to turn it to your best advantage. Also this influence gives you a well-founded feeling of optimism, which in turn creates the well-known "power of positive thinking.

Self-portrait Tuesday

First Vacation Monday. Yay to doing NOTHING!

ICH LIEBE BERLIN.

2010 End of the Year photos...

I SUFFER FROM BIPOLAR DISORDER = I AM OFF FROM FACEBOOK FOR UNDERTERMINED TIME

Are we meant to meet people who we meet throughout life? Is it possible to know ahead of time that that very person standing right in front of you now is the one who is gonna spend the rest of their lives with you? How about acquaintances, friends, and colleagues? Are these encounters meant to be or a mere coincidence by the fate of chance? 

I am so into these thoughts especially nowadays when I am getting to have some extra time to enjoy the recovery of my 'illness'-- bipolar type 2-- a reflection about life matters. 

In the month of October, I spent 3 weeks away from some groups I teach, in order to relax and free my mind from worries.

My due to health problems work leave in 2013 gave me spare time to read, write, dream more and that is why I came up with this post. Living matters to me. I am going through some major depressive moments and mania attacks thanks to bipolarity disfunction which is a normal consequence if you have the boderline type of personality that I think I may have. 

Laila ain't simple. When she loves, she really does it. When she cries, she is truly disappointed. However, when she hates, she'd rather not kill because she does not want to spend the rest of her life in jail. 

Due to depression, I decided on deactivating my FB account for. However, I am slightly going out of this depression because of the PEOPLE I have encountered who have restored in me hope in human kind. They are many and they know who they are because their names will be tagged on my Facebook page whenever I get back to Facebook. And if you are on this MAGICAL PEOPLE LIST, you should know I am thankful for having you run into my life and added in me a stronger will to move on and never give up.

I'm thankful to my wonderful all my students , my nuclear and extended family members, my lawyer, my psychiatrist, and my pilates instructor, my dentist, friends... and I must thank my husband, Roberto, who has been a wonderful support  and help on my recovery. 

The worse, to me, has been the ignorance about this disorder. Bipolar disorder which is a mood disorder suffer lots of misconceptions and we are truly misunderstood patients. Because of the fact that we are judged and never understood, our recovery gets harder. Little did I know abut mood disorders until I was diagnosed. I have been taking Queropine 200mg and Zoloft 100 mg since August, but with  no psychotherapy. I had seen a therapist for over three years, without any medication and I was working on my temper.

I swear that I am doing well with the meds, but I can do even better if I restart therapy sessions. I will, eventually.

Myths and Facts About Bipolar Disorder

Myth: People with bipolar disorder can’t get better or lead a normal life.

Fact: Many people with bipolar disorder have successful careers, happy family lives, and satisfying relationships. Living with bipolar disorder is challenging. But with treatment, healthy coping skills, and a solid support system, you can live fully while managing your symptoms.

Myth: People with bipolar disorder swing back and forth between mania and depression.

Fact: Some people alternate between extreme episodes of mania and depression, but most are depressed more often than they are manic. Mania may also be so mild that it goes unrecognized. People with bipolar disorder can also go for long stretches without symptoms.

Myth: Bipolar disorder only affects mood.

Fact: Bipolar disorder also affects your energy level, judgment, memory, concentration, appetite, sleep patterns, sex drive, and self-esteem. Additionally, bipolar disorder has been linked to anxiety, substance abuse, and health problems such as diabetes, heart disease, migraines, and high blood pressure.

Myth: Aside from taking medication, there is nothing you can do to control bipolar disorder.

Fact: While medication is the foundation of bipolar disorder treatment, therapy and self-help strategies also play important roles. You can help control your symptoms by exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, eating right, monitoring your moods, keeping stress to a minimum, and surrounding yourself with supportive people.

Get informed:http://www.helpguide.org/mental/bipolar_disorder_symptoms_treatment.htm

EDEN REVISITED

at a secret moment of space
close to the invisible gate
we take off everything on us

our garments

our masks

our skins

our senses and souls

take all off, until we take off
our very selfhoods
just to have a peep
into the green fields
where adam and eve started
to cover their private parts

by Changming Yuan

Out of the woodwork

Under this influence you feel like telling everyone you encounter exactly what you think of them, whether or not it is flattering. You are likely to be in a combative mood, which may cause other people to start a fight. Quite often this combativeness is well buried in your subconscious mind, and the only way you know it is there is because people seem to come out of the woodwork to start an argument. You may feel like the totally innocent victim of someone else's aggressiveness, and it may appear that way to a neutral observer, but nevertheless you have been sending out hostile signals at a very subtle level. At this time it is better to be conscious of your feelings of aggression, hostility and resentment toward others than to try to ignore them. At least you will have some control over them.

nonono the photo is huge but I won't fix it because it is 6 HOURS to my fucking vacation. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck it.

WHAT?

Am I writing to no one? 

I sure am. 

Who cares? 

I don't.

Are you listening to a word I say?

Probably not.

Do I care?

I sure do because I am speaking up.

How far can I go?

Very very far.

The screams sure all sound alike.

The distances are not real.

What is real anyway?

The truth is not real either.

What have I done?

So far?

A lot.

A lot.

by Laila Chris

Rafael's visit at our school

The intention was to show off the Christmas tree, right Gabi? Thks Pâmela for the hand! hehehe

Never ending work... Countdown to vacation: 3 days

Typical end-of-the-year parties... I will caption them all some time soon. Meanwhile, take a peek at my students having fun prior the holidays

And these are the guys whom I am helping graduate from our school this year